She Finds Something to Live for and Is Freed
But later on when Xiaomin saw that Mingli was finding excuses to go see that woman, she still felt uncomfortable.
Then one day, Xiaomin read these words of God: “Pernicious influences that thousands of years of ‘the lofty spirit of nationalism’ have left deep in the human heart as well as the feudal thinking by which people are bound and chained, without an iota of freedom, with no will to aspire or persevere, no desire to make progress, remaining instead passive and regressive, entrenched in a slave mentality, and so on—these objective factors have imparted an indelibly filthy and ugly cast to the ideological outlook, ideals, morality, and disposition of humanity. Humans, it would seem, are living in a terrorist world of darkness, which none among them seeks to transcend, and none among them thinks of moving on to an ideal world; rather, they are content with their lot in life, to spend their days bearing and raising children, striving, sweating, going about their chores, dreaming of a comfortable and happy family, of conjugal affection, of filial children, of joy in their twilight years as they peacefully live out their lives…. For tens, thousands, tens of thousands of years until now, people have been squandering their time in this way, with no one creating a perfect life” (“Work and Entry (3)”).
She understood from this passage that what she had been pursuing, “the love between husband and wife” and “marital harmony” are not positive things; hidden behind them is Satan’s cunning plot to corrupt and harm mankind. As Xiaomin thought over everything from their marriage to the present time, she had borne hardships without complaint and put all of her thoughts and energy into taking care of her husband and child so that they could live in harmony into old age, so they would be inseparable for the rest of their lives. Seeking “the love between husband and wife” and “marital harmony” had been her motivation for living, and when her husband was caring and solicitous of her she felt like the happiest person in the world. But when he betrayed her, she instantly went from heaven to hell, was lost and helpless, and suffered in her pain. She had tried everything she could think of to dress up in a way he would like to win back his heart and was even willing to use her own life as a bargaining chip. But when all she had gotten for her efforts was her husband’s coldness and heartlessness, her dream was completely shattered. She didn’t know what to pursue; completely adrift, she lived like the walking dead. She then realized that when people seek happiness, Satan instills their hearts with these thoughts of “the love between husband and wife” and “marital harmony,” firmly controlling their hearts so that that is all they live for. They’re constantly calculating their gains and losses for the sake of love, putting all their energy into it and paying any price. They won’t even hesitate to give their own life for it. Satan really is so evil, despicable, and toxic!
What God’s words reveal and her own personal experiences left Xiaomin full of emotion. She thought, “So once people are corrupted by Satan our hearts are full of selfishness, deceit, evil, and other corrupt satanic dispositions and on top of that there are the corruption and influence of our society’s evil trends. Everyone is selfish and despicable, just out for our own interests and we only care about our own fleshly enjoyment. Even caring for each other is just a temporary thing—it’s not very genuine. Since ancient times blood brothers and sisters have familial intimacy when their own interests aren’t involved, but as soon as something impinges on that they refuse to make concessions and sometimes even sue each other, leading to the destruction of their relationships. Friends and relatives also incite conflict and betray each other as soon as personal benefit comes into play; they strike out and take revenge and stubbornly refuse to have anything to do with each other. Husbands and wives exploit each other, caring for the other when they stand to benefit, but discarding the other as soon as disaster hits. This kind of ‘love’ absolutely cannot withstand the test of time and reality. This is why there’s no true intimacy or love between people.”
Xiaomin saw that since she lacked the truth, she couldn’t see into the reality of how people have been corrupted by Satan and was living according to the erroneous thinking that had been instilled by Satan—she had been seeking a perfect marriage and love between a husband and wife to the extent that she had placed all of her hopes in life on her husband’s shoulders. Wasn’t that an entirely unrealistic dream? It was so foolish and so pathetic! She thought about how, even though in the past she had a supposedly happy life, it was just the temporal satisfaction of the flesh. Wasn’t what she gained in the end completely empty? It was then that Xiaomin really saw that the thoughts and perspectives Satan injects into man are all negative and living by that can only bring about more pain, and no happiness to speak of. Understanding that gave Xiaomin great emotional release.
Later, Xiaomin read another passage of God’s words: “Only if one knows God and has the truth does he live in the light; and only when his view of the world and his view of life change does he change fundamentally. When he has a life goal and comports himself according to the truth; when he absolutely submits to God and lives by God’s word; when he feels assured and brightened deep in his soul; when his heart is free of darkness; and when he lives completely freely and unrestrained in God’s presence—only then does he live a true human life and become a person possessing truth” (“Only by Pursuing the Truth Can You Obtain Changes in Your Disposition”).
God’s words allowed Xiaomin to understand that God is light and He is holy—all He expresses is the truth, it is all positive, and it is also the reality of life that people should possess. Once people understand the truth they’ll be able to see through Satan’s methods and tactics for corrupting mankind; they’ll be able to establish a correct pursuit and perspective through God’s words and take the right path in life. As a created being she should come before God and read His words often, understand the truth, and tailor her practice to His requirements. This way she’ll be able to escape from the shackles of Satan and the harm it does, live in the light, and her spirit will enjoy peace and stability.
Xiaomin thought of how she had come to understand so many things since gaining her faith in God and reading God’s words, and how she was stuck before living in pain from her husband’s betrayal that she couldn’t extricate herself from and it was God’s words that allowed her to recognize the root of his depravity and to clearly see how Satan uses evil trends and all sorts of absurd thinking and perspectives to corrupt human beings—it was no longer so painful for her. She personally experienced that God’s words truly can resolve people’s practical difficulties, guide us to freedom from our suffering, point out the correct path in life, and allow us to live freely and unburdened. She could feel from her heart how incredibly precious and valuable God’s words are! Xiaomin then set her resolve to certainly abandon her old lifestyle of depravity, to follow God and take the path of light of seeking the truth and worshiping God, to live out a life of meaning and value.
Bidding Farewell to Melancholy and Troubles, Welcoming the Light
In an effort to stop Mingli from continuing his affair, in the past Xiaomin wanted to know about his every step and control him, not allowing him to go out for fun. This not only exhausted all her emotional energy but was also fruitless. At that point, Xiaomin no longer forced anything on Mingli, but put her marriage in God’s hands and threw her heart into reading God’s words and seeking to understanding more of the truth. She later started performing her duty in the church and frequently attending gatherings with brothers and sisters where they read God’s words. As God’s words increasingly occupied her heart and she was more drawn to positive things, she gradually brooded over Mingli’s infidelity less, the troubles in her heart disappeared, and she felt a peace and ease she had never experienced before.
One time Mingli forgot his phone at home and Xiaomin wanted to look at it to see if he had been in touch with that woman. However, she realized that she was well aware he was in contact with her, and snooping on his phone could only increase her anxiety and allow her to be toyed with by Satan. So, she quietly prayed within her heart, “Oh God! Please protect my heart—I don’t want to be toyed with by Satan anymore.” After praying that thought was no longer so strong.
After he got back home Xiaomin reminded him to check his phone for messages to make sure nothing would be held up. He couldn’t quite believe that Xiaomin hadn’t looked on his phone. She said very frankly, “I’m a believer now and God’s words require us to be honest people. I wouldn’t lie or cheat you. You wronged me in the past, and I argued and instigated trouble with you, but that was because I didn’t understand the truth. I was toyed with and damaged by Satan. Since believing in God, I’ve read a lot of His words and have understood a number of truths. I don’t resent you as much as I used to and my own suffering has lessened. In the past, a lot of my actions weren’t in line with God’s will, but going forward I’m going to act according to His words and gradually change.” Seeing how up-front she was, Mingli nodded his head with a thoughtful look in his eyes.
Xiaomin was able to come out from the fog of the collapse of her marriage; she was no longer entangled in all of her complex feelings, and things gradually took a turn for the better. Mingli started going out at night less and less, spending more time at home. Sometimes he started asking Xiaomin if she wanted a late-night snack or not, and then would make something for her. Their relationship improved quite a lot and their life together slowly became peaceful again. Mingli and that woman later totally broke off their relationship.
After all of this had passed, Xiaomin looked back on every step of the crisis in her marriage, when God had saved her from Satan’s harm. She gained a deep understanding that only God is truly our support, and only by having faith in God, following Him, and understanding the truth can we see through Satan’s trickery. Also, only by listening to God’s words and putting them into practice can we escape Satan’s shackles, fully cast off our suffering, and walk into the light. Only then will we possess true joy and happiness within our souls. Thank God!